iwantmyfiancetodisciplineme
| Forum role | Member since | Last activity | Topics created | Replies created |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Member | Mar 4, 2016 (10 years) |
- | 1 | 0 |
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Bio
Well, I've already explained my reasoning for this blog and if you missed it, it's right at the top of the homepage. I've always thought about being spanked ever since I can remember although my parents never spanked me (thank God!!!) I mean I was curious about being spanked (I didn't know by whom but the thought of my parents spanking me terrified me!) My dad did threatened me with a spanking once and it scared the living daylights out of me because he doesn't threaten; when he says something he means it, so when he told me the next time I talked back I was going to get a spanking, I was going to get a spanking, so I believed him, was scared to death, and never talked back again... I'm not even kidding you.
The closest I ever came to getting spanked as a child was when I was 8 or 9 and I was at my best friend NA's house with our other best friend A. To be honest I don't remember exactly what it was we were doing but I do remember my Aunt N (she isn't really my aunt, but she is the mother of the friend I've had literally since birth, and our parents are close so I refer to her as such,) came down the stairs, looked at the three of us, and asked if we wanted spankings. I was horrified... I mean was she seriously going to spank us? Her daughter immediately said no and my other best friend and I still hadn't responded, probably because of shock, and Aunt N again looked directly at A and I and again asked if we wanted spankings, and immediately we responded "No." She told us that if she had to come downstairs again she was going to give each of us a spanking. Needless to say we were all on our best behavior for fear of her coming down and actually acting on her threat. I think I thought about being held accountable for my actions and spanked accordingly since then but I never was until I was an adult.
Fast forward to my early adult years and my at the time BF brought up DD, which I had never even heard of at the time, and although I was reluctant, I decided to give it a shot. At first we were consistent and the relationship was great, and then he stopped being consistent, and I didn't ask him to be more consistent, and gradually we faded apart; it wasn't anything angry or like we had massive fights all the time- we simply just drifted apart and needed to split up or else massive fights would most certainly ensue. Now I've caught you all up to date and today we're BFF's and no, he absolutely does not discipline me anymore, however I am glad we were able to stay friends and to be honest, the relationship as friends is better than ever.
As I stated I'm engaged and ideally I'd like my fiance and future husband to be able to love me enough to discipline me; I believe that by my willingness to get over his knee and baring my bottom, not only am I showing him submission, but I am also demonstrating that I love and trust him enough to punish me as I see fit, and happily accept it. I would like for us to have a Biblical CDD marriage because up until about fifty years ago it was not only accepted but common for the husband to give his wife a good spanking if he felt she needed it. However my fiance is a conservative Pentecostal Christian so this discussion could go either way; he could either be totally for it given the Scriptural backup or he could think it's abusive and Lord knows what he'd think of me.
Anyway, in a utopian world my fiance and future husband would discipline me as he saw fit; when marriage was traditional and a husband wasn't afraid to give his wife a good spanking if he deemed it necessary, the divorce rate was extremely low, as opposed to now where it's approximately 50%. Notwithstanding I'd like for him to be the HoH and take me in hand in a CDD marriage, but I don't quite know how to tell him even though it is what a Biblical marriage prescribes.
Furthermore, The Bible teaches the wife should submit to her husband and I can't think of any better form of submission than to bare my bottom and get over my fiance's knee, because I am trusting him to know what's best for me and to hold me accountable for my actions, I am showing him I trust that he will not abuse his right to discipline me but demonstrating I know he won't hesitate to give me the spanking I deserve if necessary, and I accept it because I know he's doing it out of love, I am trusting him to make me a better person, and I'm also showing my love for him because I know that he must be accountable to God, so I would like to be held accountable to him: it's only fair right? I mean I just have to answer to him but he has to be accountable for his entire household to the man upstairs... I think I'd rather take my spanking thank you. To be honest I'm not a very submissive person and I know in order to become a good Christian wife I need to learn my place, and unfortunately not only do I not know how to broach this with my fiance, but to compound things, we live long distance and only see each other approximately every other month.
Also I have realized that my degree of motivation has seriously plummeted over the past few years and I know that I am much more accountable and get many more things done with either the threat of a spanking or especially if I already have a sore bottom; ironically it seems that my condo becomes much more organized or cleaned after I've just had a spanking and have a red and sore bottom. I've also accepted, but am not comfortable with, the fact that I need discipline in the form of spankings in my life and I get much more done when I know a spanking can be given at any time. Since my fiance is unavailable at this time for the aforementioned reasons I have sought out an online daddy to not only punish me, but to help me learn submission, and to become comfortable with my need to be punished so I'll be able to tell my fiance.
I'm not sure how I feel about having a "Daddy" yet as I've never had one but am trying to get used to it, however one thing I am getting used to is having a sore bottom and putting my nose in the corner. Hmmph!