sometimeswisesometimesotherwise
| Forum role | Member since | Last activity | Topics created | Replies created |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Member | Sep 22, 2019 (6 years) |
- | 1 | 0 |
- Forum role
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Sep 22, 2019 (6 years)
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Bio
I'm not really the type of person who likes to write things about myself. I could have this conversation in person because most people won't remember what I said, but once it's written it's out there for everyone to read (ugh).
My life has been a continuous journey of self-discovery. Decades of hiding myself away from people, then having a brave moment and stepping out of the dark into the light, only to retreat...and then repeat. This pattern continued until my 50th birthday when I realized that I needed to change or I would die. It took over a year to make a decision but I finally decided to change and live.
The road to self-discovery when led by God brought me to find the real me. It has not been easy but the rewards have been amazing! I know who I am, I know that I am the person God created me to be. He has led me to wonderful people to be both my friends and my family (because my real family does not speak to me).
I also have been given the most wonderful job in the world, working with the out-casts of society and I love them all. I may be the only person who is excited to go to work on Monday morning! I've always wanted to do something to help people, which I have through out my many jobs, however this job is like the "icing on the cake". I received the greatest compliment from one of my clients a couple of weeks ago after sharing a bit about myself at a lunch we put on for the homeless/low income people in our downtown core. He said "this is why we like you because you're not a phony Christian, you're real, you get us". Even writing this brings a tear of joy to my eyes. He's right, I am real and I'm happy with who I am (even if it took 56 years to get here!). I've always been worried about being judged by others...I'm not pretty enough, I'm not smart enough, etc., but I know this is a lie. I may have a moment when those old thoughts creep back in my head (like now when I'm writing this), but it's much easier to push them aside now.
I know that what I learn from this course will only enhance the real me, the me that is no longer going to hide in a dark room.